Sunday, August 29, 2021

Starships and Stay-ships, Moonbases and Mars-bases, Fun...Profit?

NASA hopes to return to the moon by 2024 (the Artemis Program) and chose SpaceX’s Starship for use as its lunar lander (designated HLS – Human Landing System). The Starship is powered by three ingredients: liquid methane, liquid oxygen, and an electric car magnet and human dynamo named Elon Musk. Musk plans a kind of million man migration to Mars (which will include other genders – I used “man” to keep the alliteration rolling). For Elon, going to the moon is a little like Coca-Cola deciding to produce apple juice because it’s got spare capacity at its bottling plant. In fact, Elon has started so many different projects in the last few years that I have to wonder about his attention span.

Nasa’s HLS choice caused chagrin in the World’s Richest Guy, Amazon founder Jeff Bezos, whose moon lander floundered. Bezos’ space launch start-up, Blue Origin,  joined established aerospace contractors to submit a competing bid. Upon losing, he immediately mobilized an army of lawyers and lobbyists to put a stop to the SpaceX contract. They argue that spending 3 billion dollars on Elon Musk’s more capable lander is nuts when you can spend ten billion on their much less capable one (this being established DC tradition and the only one congress holds sacred). Now, I won’t claim to be an astronaut, but this effort to squash the upstart start-up gives me hope that their lunar lander will work. After all, if SpaceX fails, it will fail quickly, given the promised pace of Starship development. Then Blue Origin, with its pocket-sized politicians, could pick up the pieces and profit. 

Starship ranks as the world’s most powerful rocket. Mated with its first stage “super-heavy” booster, it is taller than the Statue of Liberty atop her pedestal. The Lunar-lander portion alone is as tall as a 17 story building (minus the thirteenth floor, of course). Both the booster and the starship will be reusable – and SpaceX intends to build a lot of Starships in a variety of configurations (it’s a “cheaper by the dozen” kinda deal). The lunar-lander could carry 100+ tons of cargo to the surface with ample pressurized living space for the astronauts. They, and the cargo, can descend from the Starship penthouse to the lunar surface by way of an elevator – down, please. The possibilities here are enough to boggle even a stubbornly un-boggled mind, such as my own.


Given the possibilities, the project, as originally envisioned by NASA, seems rather unambitious. The contract covers one “roundtrip moon-trip” for four Astronauts, with hopefully more to follow at a rather sluggish pace. Artemis is somewhat more capable than the Apollo program from fifty years ago. This expensive turkey is unlikely to survive in the congressional slaughterhouse for long. What is needed is something much more inspiring that can mobilize public support. Allow me to offer a few suggestions, a not-so-little dream project for Mr. Musk to pursue while I indulge in my afternoon naps.


Initially, it will start with three dedicated Starship lunar-landers for the moonbase. Ship number one and two will have their retro-rockets mounted around the top of the ship to minimize the kick-up of lunar dust during landing (as is currently conceived). The first lander is maximized for cargo and the second for astronauts. Both will land on the moon upright. After unloading the cargo from the carrier, the astronauts will prepare a long and narrow pad for starship three (the pad might be packed lunar soil covered by a tarp).


Starship number three will be a “stay-ship,” built with its small retro-rockets along its side, rather than around the top, so it can land lengthwise. After it is secured in place, this ship’s engines and fuel tanks will be removed, allowing the entire volume of the ship to be used as a lunar base (the Starship is nine meters in diameter and 50 meters long – I’m using metric measurements since it has left the U.S.). It would be designed and built on Planet Earth with this end in mind. The Stayship can carry much of the required supplies for this transformation in its cargo bay. The powerful raptor engines – configured for operation in a vacuum – will be repurposed to power space “tow motors.” At some point, these will go into lunar orbit with containers full of “exports” and return with containers full of “imports,” after a careful rendezvous with the cargo ship. The removed fuel tanks of the “stay-ship” will be used to store methane and oxygen to fuel the space tugs. Oxygen is rather abundant on the moon, molecularly bound with iron, for instance. Oxygen is also found in the moon-water that clings as ice to the dark side of craters, but moon-water might be a bit too precious to use as a fuel source. Methane, the fuel used by starships, appears rather rarer. 


At some point, the “astronaut” starship will return to Earth orbit with some or all of the astronauts. It will then move cargo and personnel back and forth from Earth orbit to Lunar orbit. The space “tow motors” will pick up supplies in lunar orbit and deliver them to the surface. A space-based warehouse might be called for (perhaps parked at a Lagrange Point, where the interplay of the gravitational fields of the earth and moon will keep it in a stable orbit between the earth and the moon).


Additional “stay-ships” will land at the moonbase and have their guts removed. These ships will be equipped to make solar panels, smelt metals, and produce glass and ceramics for future base expansion. Aluminum and steel production on the moon could provide structural material for a ship bound for Mars but built on the moon. The stored guts of the stay-ships can be used for the Mars ships. These “Mars” ships will only travel in a vacuum or through an extremely thin Martian atmosphere, so they can be designed with this fact in mind. Liquid oxygen can be made on the moon. Perhaps supply ships could fill up with liquid oxygen in lunar orbit and leave liquid methane for the moon. With luck, trapped subsurface gases might be found on the moon (methane, CO, CO2, ammonia). 


At some point, the starship that was maximized for cargo and waited patiently on the lunar surface can be refueled and join the second starship in trips to Earth and back (or head to Mars).


So, two of the first products for lunar export could be rockets and LOX. The moon’s “comparative advantage” in trade might be its one-sixth of earth’s gravity. It could provide a port for large nuclear-powered ships to move about the solar system mining asteroids. If these ships came close to earth we’d hear those “what if it crashes in my neighborhood” scares that accompany such discussions.


This plan would require a larger “up-front” investment but could yield a lunar base that pays for its ongoing operation and might even provide a good return on the initial investment.  That will mean more opportunity for Blue Origin, Boeing, and other interested parties, so they should get their lobbyist to work on something more “inspiring,” rather than more costly.

Sunday, April 11, 2021

More Lite than Light!

During the first Obama/Biden administration I decided light opera was the best format for commentary. With music and song, it would float above the mess the way those mountains in Avatar float above planet Pandora. So this Opera will not just be light, it’ll be anti-gravity: No matter how grave the situation, it will be anti-the-gravity of the situation.

The Opera is set on the island estate of the multi-billionaire Artful Shortseller. Art hosts “The International Conference to Solve All the World's Problems with One Foul Swipe.” What is the foul swipe, you ask? Sorry, you are not supposed to ask and I'm not allowed to answer.

It starts with a big production number. The new President's team marches through the gates like parading Olympic athletes planning to disrespect the flag. As they enter they sing:

The DC Press Corps and Officials
With Diplomatic Creep,
We cross History’s Stage.
Both shy and meek
As The World Turns, amazed.

Praise we spread in full,
Without a boastful word,
We give credit to our Bull,
Not just the nagging herd!

President Biden
(Wanders about as he mumbles):
Salute the Marines, Mr. Jill Biden. Salute. What.
(Bumps into the scenery; Consults his mePad; begins to sing.)
Like a mentally stable-man
World leaders, I’ll approach.
One I’ll treat like a door-man,
as I deliver my reproach.
But them that Trump has cowed,
I’ll look squarely in the knees!
As I offer a gracious bow,
And sincere apollo-gee.

Hail, hell! What do I do next? 
(Checks pad) 
"Tell European Nations
Of Power abrogations!"
But Poo-tin calls me a tease.
So I’ll implore “believe me, please!”

I call this number, “History Brought to Boil by a Cracked Pot.”

At the center of Art’s estate is “The Mean-Well.” This is a deep well, as well as a mean well. For some mysterious reason, well-meaning people (mostly voters) get sucked in, fall past the mean, and even plunge below average, which drags down the average, causing the mean to become even meaner. These folks don't mean to be mean, they mean to be equitable. What is the powerful attractive force of the Mean-Well? Could it be the mean-welling of the Mean-Well?

Actually, the attractive force is the fabled Lost Thirteenth Law of an Admired Marxist (choose one). This lost law is forty thousand pages of progressive legislation that, if adopted in its entirety, will yield the forty million pages of regulation that will, in the end, make all this stuff work. The Thirteenth Law was typed before white-out, back when progressives didn’t make mistakes. However, it has been rewritten by AIs (Artificial Intellectuals) using out-white (and there’s a lot of that in it).

Thank dog this is a work of fiction.

The Opera needs a love story but not to worry: with so many malignant narcissists involved, it has lots of love stories.

Invention Prevention

When I was a boy watching WWII submarine dramas, I came up with the idea for a submarine that pushed itself forward by taking in water at the front and pumping it from the rear. In a stroke of genius, I decided to use the water coming in the front of the sub to turn the turbines that would power the pumps that pushed the water out the back. Sure, it would need a bit of a push to get going, but after that you're good.

I got really excited about the idea because I thought it might have applications in the cold war. I told my father so he could maybe call President Eisenhower. My dad said I had just invented a “perpetual motion” machine. Upon hearing this I swelled with pride. I said, "Gosh, golly, gee! I have barely achieved the age of reason and already I've invented a perpetual motion machine! How awesome is that! I'm like the Mozart – whoever that is – of Machine Inventors."

Then my father explained the scientific consensus of the day (thank god that’s changed). There I was, not yet a youth, and I came face to face with my own logical fallacy -- not someone else's, mind you (this happens quite a lot) but my own. Back then we didn't protect our children from such events.

The fact that physics could interfere with a rich fantasy life kinda turned me off on that whole course of study (I should have gone into central banking, where making something from nothing is central to the entire process).

Friday, April 9, 2021

Plan "B" from outer space

 Salvation is a TV series on Amazon Prime. The first season is free.  I'm watching because it's not that good, so when they start charging I'll stop watching. It's kinda like when you are beating your head against the wall, and someone says if you keep doing that you are going to have to pay for the damage, so you stop. 

Here's the plot summary. The earth's in trouble. Again. An asteroid will destroy the planet in six months unless humanity destroys it (Planet Earth) first. Granted, that's a tight time frame for man-caused planetary destruction (it's OK to use "man" in this context) but doable. So the asteroid is actually "plan B from Outerspace."

It's the size of Washington DC and will impact Washington, DC, which sounds good until you see the simulation: the entire surface of the planet turns into molten lava! OMG, not even a dinosaur could survive that! There's always hope, though.

Hope, in this case, is a deep space probe out by Jupiter that can be redirected to crash into the asteroid. This is like a bullet hitting a bullet, with one bullet being the approximate size of an empty tin can and the other being the approximate size of a fully ladened supertanker. But, if you take into consideration their high speeds and something called "inertial mass," which has something to do with something called physics, then the Asteroid breaks apart and the resulting impact no longer destroys the entire planet or kills all 12 billion of us (and our pets). Instead, the pieces miss Washington D.C. and hit Beijing and Moscow, killing 1.1 billion of those people (and their pets). When this possible outcome is described at a Pentagon meeting, everyone goes hmm at the same time. They decide on this collision course. Unfortunately, there are many collision courses! 

President Biden is totally out of the loop and uninvolved, as you might expect.  They could have had Martin Sheen play him (he's old enough) if only there were a believable plot device like his getting briefed. His absence is explained in episode six when he's referred to as a "she." Apparently,  he begins self-identifying as a woman because that description is easier to believe than honest, moderate, and competent. Also, he can now freely sniff women's hair because a woman can do that to another woman, can't she?

During this period of Presidential transition,  government agents and billionaires do what they want with government resources. This is quite realistic but they should call it "infrastructure spending." Also, the deep state is deeply sinister. That's the sort of portrayal that annoyed me ten years ago, but these days, not-so-much (thank you, James Clapper and John Brennan).

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Safety Quest

 Oh, hell. I don't feel like explaining this.

 Quest Carefully

Often when on a Quest
You'll create an unholy mess
And cause great distress to others:
Such as horses, goats and your mother.
So it is best,
Outside the nest,
To Quest -- carefully.

When you see a dragon at the break of day,
Run away.
Run away.
Do not believe what the soothsayers say.
Require proof
From the sooth.
If an old man on a bridge offers his advice,
Treat him nice.
Treat him nice.

Quest Carefully.
Use care as you stare
At Buxom, bawdy, barmaids.
Do not imbibe the potions you get
From cute redheads, and brunettes.
Blonds, too,
If it's true,
They've had more fun --
Meaning more flings flung.
And when climbing a ladder
To rescue her from "what's the matter?"
Don't stand on the top rung.

Quest Carefully.

As you pursue your Quest
Never rest, never rest --
Recklessly.
Do not be reckless in your rest!

Sleep with care.

Beware! The woods have bears
And the forest is where
The wolves have their lairs.
And never eat meat
unless it's been cooked to an internal temperature
Of 160 degrees Fahrenheit and you should immediately refrigerate --
Yes, refrigerate!
The unused portions.
This is also the case
When you reheat -- and eat --
the meat you think safe.
Why not be a Vegan?

Quest Carefully. Quest Carefully.
And as you quest, never rest -- recklessly.
I left some hair colors out (space considerations).

Friday, July 6, 2012

Slap them with a Tax

I wrote some lyrics! They are lyrical! They can be sung to the tune of every Radiohead song I’ve ever heard (I haven’t heard them all).
 Big G and the D.C.’s

When I see you eating Big Macs,
With your happy-meal deal kids
I feel your weight upon my shoulders.
I want to…
Slap, slap, slap.

I see you in your big car,
On a commute that is too far;
I feel my temperature rising.
I want to…
Slap, slap, slap.

At the movies when you eat popcorn
So full of salt and fat
I feel forlorn.
and want to…
Slap, slap, slap.
Slap, slap, slap!
Slap them with a tax!
Slap. Slap!
Slap them with a tax!
I don’t want to be your lover,
I just want to control
what’s in your cupboard.
Slap, slap!
Slap them with a tax!
I don’t want to be your doctor
I just want to decide
What's proper.
Slap, slap!
Slap them with a tax!
I don’t want to be your banker,
Just the confiscator of your
Stash, stash, stash!
I don’t want to be your savior,
Just your reg-you-lay-tor, 
Until you meet your Undertaker.
Now, no more lip as I count the bullets in your clips.
Peace.
 15 Steps then a Shear Drop!

Thursday, July 5, 2012

It's Powerful Stuff

Some years ago I started doing commentary on current events through the use of musical comedy. Unfortunately, it led to uncontrolled weeping so I stopped. Still, I like putting my thoughts in song (yes, song!), and here is my latest attempt. Think Punk Rock. Starts sweet, ends loud.

Clerk Power

I know you think I'm heaven sent
The greatest hope your world presents.
Your situation's critical
But to me you're typical.

Bad vibrations,
In creation.
Alienation
fills the nation.
Check the box, don't pout!
Just fill -- your forms out.
We must know you. Or we'll no you.
Yes, we know you. And will no you.
Don't break the mold. It fits you.
That moldy mold? Is for you.
Clerk Power. Clerk Power.

I got you feeling desperate
The needs you have are barely met.
But leave no blanks upon the form,
Always behave within the norm.
I'll estrange you.
Rearrange you.
Bad vibrations
Fill creation.
Alienation,
throughout the nation.
I will serve you,
On a platter.
Does it matter? Do you matter?
Clerk Power! Clerk Power!
Clerk Power! Clerk Power!

I know you think I'm heaven sent
The greatest chance your world presents.
But before solutions are devised
All interviews must be reprized.

I'll estrange you!
Rearrange you!
Take your measure?
At my pleasure!
Fill the forms out.
Does it fit now?
Have a cow, now?
Don't act crazy!
Take a nap now.
Don't be lazy!
Or outrageous
It's contagious!
Here to serve you,
On a platter.
Does it matter? Does it matter?
Don't you matter? Do you matter?
Clerk Power! Clerk Power! Clerk Power!
Whew. I was shouting a bit much at the end there. Calm. Down. When did the slogan All Power to the People become All Power to the Clerks?  When the people shouting "All Power to the People" became clerks.

With apologies to Kurt Cobain.