Invention Prevention

When I was a boy watching WWII submarine dramas, I came up with the idea for a submarine that pushed itself forward by taking in water at the front and pumping it from the rear. In a stroke of genius, I decided to use the water coming in the front of the sub to turn the turbines that would power the pumps that pushed the water out the back. Sure, it would need a bit of a push to get going, but after that you're good.

I got really excited about the idea because I thought it might have applications in the cold war. I told my father so he could maybe call President Eisenhower. My dad said I had just invented a “perpetual motion” machine. Upon hearing this I swelled with pride. I said, "Gosh, golly, gee! I have barely achieved the age of reason and already I've invented a perpetual motion machine! How awesome is that! I'm like the Mozart – whoever that is – of Machine Inventors."

Then my father explained the scientific consensus of the day (thank god that’s changed). There I was, not yet a youth, and I came face to face with my own logical fallacy -- not someone else's, mind you (this happens quite a lot) but my own. Back then we didn't protect our children from such events.

The fact that physics could interfere with a rich fantasy life kinda turned me off on that whole course of study (I should have gone into central banking, where making something from nothing is central to the entire process).